She became pregnant and gave birth to a son and said, “God has taken away my disgrace.” – Genesis 30:23

Today’s Scripture Reading (July 21, 2018): Genesis 30

We all have things that we don’t like about ourselves. Plastic Surgeons can buy big houses because of our insecurity and our need to fix something about ourselves. But the terrible truth is that if we are not comfortable with who we are, there is very little that we can change about our lives, whether it is through the work of a plastic surgeon, or a job, or more money, that will make us comfortable with who we are.

Rachel lived in a world where it often seemed that the purpose of a woman was to bear children. And Rachel could not give Jacob any children. Therefore she could not fulfill what the culture believed was her purpose. And because of this lack, Rachel was not comfortable with who she was; she believed that she had not fulfilled her duty as the wife of Jacob. What is interesting about Rachel is that, like Sarah, her husband’s grandmother, from everything that we know about the marriage of Jacob and Rachel it appears that their relationship was strong. Rachel seemed to be the only woman that Jacob wanted, and probably the only woman that Jacob ever wanted. But Jacob’s unconditional love was not enough for Rachel.

So Rachel follows in the steps of Sarah and asks Jacob to sleep with her servant. It was a culturally acceptable solution, but the solution had failed for Sarah. Maybe Rachel didn’t know that side of the story, but the culturally acceptable solution had only increased the failure that Sarah believed herself to be.

We don’t have a similar story about Rachel and her servant, except this statement after Rachel gives birth to her first son, Joseph. Finally, she believed that God had removed her disgrace. So that meant that once again the culturally acceptable solution and the children born to Rachel’s servant was no more successful at making Rachel feel whole than Sarah was made whole by the birth of Ishmael to her servant, Hagar.

So, maybe the question is - Did the birth of Joseph really erase Rachel’s shame and make her feel better about herself? And that is a question that we really can’t answer. But, if Rachel’s life was anything like ours, my guess is that it didn’t; at least, not completely. Because if we are not comfortable with who we are, no external circumstance will make us feel comfortable with who we are.    

Tomorrow’s Scripture Reading: Genesis 31