Saturday, 26 October 2019

Friends - Come back, come back, O Shulammite; come back, come back, that we may gaze on you! He - Why would you gaze on the Shulammite as on the dance of Mahanaim? – Song of Songs 6:13


Today’s Scripture Reading (October 26, 2019): Song of Songs 6

L. M. Montgomery, in her classic book “Anne of Green Gables,” comments that “I read in a book once that a rose by any other name would smell as sweet, but I've never been able to believe it. I don't believe a rose WOULD be as nice if it was called a thistle or a skunk cabbage” (Capitals hers). Of course, the book that contains the comment she is referring to is William Shakespeare’s “Romeo and Juliet.” And it might be that both Shakespeare and Montgomery are correct. From Shakespeare’s point of view, it is the flower that is fragrant and not the name. We understand the word rose only because that is the name that we have connected to the flower. If I told you that the flower that we know of us a “rose” was really called a “red cup” (let’s stay away from skunk cabbage), it would not change the fragrance of the flower.

But we think in a specific language. For me, I think in English. It is English concepts that I understand, and so Anne is also right. Even if you have never smelled a skunk cabbage, you would not be expecting something that smelled pretty with a name like that because you know that “skunk” is the English name for an animal that has the potential to smell very bad. The building blocks that we use to think start with a language, and continues with our cultural understanding.

And that includes the idea of names. It wasn’t that long ago that a woman would take the man’s name without even considering not doing so. It was a connection that in our language and culture was proper. But, not everyone feels that way. I have some friends who happen to be brothers, and each member of the family has a different family name. The family originated from a place of war and making it hard to identify siblings was an essential consideration in the naming of the brothers, and the reason why none of them share a family name. And under those circumstances, the wife does not take the husband's name.

Today, as I counsel couples preparing for marriage, the post-marriage name is more of a conversation that needs to be had than it might have been in the past. Many women still choose to change their name and take the name of their new husbands. Some want to marry but to also keep their own names and identity. One couple decided at the end of our conversation that the man would take the woman’s name.   

This is the only place in the “Song of Songs” where the bride is called “the Shulammite.” And in using this name, the bride is being identified with Solomon. Shulammite is the feminine form of Solomon, much like Donna is the female form of Don or Donald in English. Here she is identifying herself with her husband by taking his name. The use of “Shulammite” indicates the strong unity that existed between the couple.

Just as a further note, it is crucial to understand that the “He,” “She,” and “Friends” listed at the beginning of each section in the Song of Songs is actually entirely arbitrary. Sometimes the speaker is obvious. But sometimes it is a stretch. And maybe sometimes, we get it wrong. The NIV places the words at the tail end of this verse into the mouth of Solomon, but it might be that it was meant to be that the voice of “the Shulammite” that is heard here. The context is hard to understand, but it makes sense that, as the friend's clamor for her to return, she would respond in great humility, wondering why they would want to look at her. After all, all that she is, in her mind, is summed up in her relationship with the king. The Shulammite is nothing without Solomon. We might not always understand that sentiment in our culture, but it would have been very appropriate in the culture of the Shulammite. 

Tomorrow’s Scripture Reading: Song of Songs 7

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