Sunday, 11 October 2015

But if her husband forbids her when he hears about it, he nullifies the vow that obligates her or the rash promise by which she obligates herself, and the LORD will release her. – Numbers 30:8


Today’s Scripture Reading (October 11, 2015): Numbers 30

Maybe one of the shortest marriages in history was between Britney Spears and her childhood friend, Jason Alexander. The marriage took place in January 2004 and it lasted for 55 hours. Officially the reason for the annulment was that “Spears lacked understanding of her actions to the extent that she was incapable of agreeing to the marriage.” Translation: someone among her handlers decided that the marriage was not a good career move and pushed to have the marriage overturned. Britney Spears, at the age of twenty-two was deemed not old enough or responsible enough to make a vow on her own – she needed permission get married.

The idea is an ancient one. Some people before a certain age would be considered incapable of making a promise. And with good reason. It takes a certain amount of “growing up” before we are able to make good cause and effect decisions. A child is much more likely, at least usually, to make rash or incorrect decisions. It is the idea behind an “Age of Majority” law. If you are below that age, there are certain decisions that you are unable to make (marriage is often one of them.) There are also certain crimes for which you can’t be charged. The Age of Majority is often somewhere between sixteen and twenty-one, but it can be as low as twelve. And the reality is that those ages are actually all probably low. We really don’t begin to the see the world as an adult until we are somewhere around twenty-five.

In male dominated societies, that idea of being able to make vows is shifted from a set age to the idea of a relationship with a man. For a woman within these societies, they are deemed incapable of making their own decisions if they have a significant man in their lives – a father when they are younger and a husband when they are older. And although I admit that the idea of a position of majority, the ability for a person to make a vow on their own initiative, based on sex sounds primitive, it is still a reality for women in many parts of our contemporary world. It also might not be a bad idea, although I would widen the idea.

The reality behind the law as it is applied to a marital unit is that both partners in a marriage must be pulling in the same direction if the marriage is going to work. In a male dominated society, the direction is set by the man and the woman is expected to comply. But in egalitarian societies that is not the case. In these societies, it might not be that this rule needs to be tossed out, but rather that it needs to be extended. Both people in the marriage still need to agree on decisions, because even in egalitarian societies the marital unit needs to pull together in the same direction – the only thing that changes is that it is no longer exclusively the job of the male to set the direction. So unity in decision making remains essential.

Some institutions are responding to this reality and require the active of agreement of both the husband and the wife before a decision can be made. The idea is nothing more than an extension of this law – and both the husband and the wife need to agree before any promise is considered to be valid.

Tomorrow’s Scripture Reading: Numbers 31

No comments:

Post a Comment